 Wednesday, April 30, 2008
 just leave me alone.. at 7:55 PMnobody understands how i feel.. nobody knows me at all.. people accuse me even before i say anything.. im not a bitch..!! im not anything... does anybody understand? the feeling of being ignored.. the feeling of wanting to cry whenever i see you? why cant you put away your stupid darned pride..? why is accompanying me such a waste of time? why is even talking to me a waste of money? is it me? or it is you, i tried to tolerate all your ways i tried to tell myself.. guys are all like that.. but i just cant hold out any longer.... im not invincible... im not unhurtable... did you know how much hurt it can inflict on me with that one simple sentence of yours? -------------------- grey clouds filled the whole sky.. covering the sun from view.. that little hope.. that miniscule ray of hope.. gone... broken into shards of disppointment n overwhelming sadness she sits in her study room... motionless... staring into space as she recalls all he did to her... tears dripped unconsciously down her cheeks.. she did not know what else to do... her heart's confused.... her head's aching... he tore her heart into shreds... n blood's pouring out.. but he dont even seem to care a slightest bit about her... he and his games.. he and his frens... he and his pride... she had enough of it... she's tired of all this, wants to end all her misery.. but theres no way out.. she cries in despondency.. she screams out in pain... but no one.. nobody hears her at all xoxo , you know you love me . EEEEEEYERR..!!~~ at 4:00 PMpissed off sia..... what go home? pei worh little while also cannort marh? sua lorh... this kind of boyfriend bu yao also sua lorh.... what the hell? he said tt only if i play some stupid game n win him then he talk to me lehhh... what the FUCK..!!~~ breaking up with him soon if this continues =P besides got bf or no bf also like the same de... forget him lerh lar..!!~ waliau... today maths paper fail le laaaaaaaaarh.... paper one 60 marks.. okay happie happie finished half an hour early. tot can get a1 actually. then paper 2 arrived at 10 am... 40 marks... first few question i was wow tt i could actually do this thing.. then saw the next page... i was like what the hell?... all the question so cheem luhhh... see liao sit down there scratching my head... ohmygawd it was so hardddddd..... got leave 2 blanks n didnt know how to do 4 others..... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... my a1's gone.... mamamia...!!~ ------------past few dayss..... _monday_ woooooooots compo wrote 4 1/2 pages wakakakaa.. wrote bout dhe topic: a terrible discovery.. hahaa wrote tt i found myself actually sold off by my real parents to my foster parents... paper 2: okay okay relatively easy =D do-able... wakakaka shud get at least at least a b4 =X _tuesday_ alamak..... saw my ex 4 times in a row..... 1. early in dah morning was eating my lunch with daniel n jianyong then saw him walk past.. he saw me also .. then he hurri run up the escalator... ( LOL, not like i would eat him up liddat ) 2. in the canteen.. clara was like * psst psst * ur ex!!! n then made an X shape with her hands n pointed to him... i was going crazy oledi with all the stress of memorising my si han de ge shi.. lol i de-stressed on vincent's right hand.. ( sorry vincent for making ur hand bleed =X so sry...) 3. after exam, in the hall... saw him as i was going out.. 4. he said he saw me in dah squeezy squeezy 51.. i was like you sure? i didnt see him at all lorh... mayb cus i was studying my math... =X gt once when the bus braked.. i lost my balanced n fell on wj o.o owww.. wonder if my ex saw wj too... eeeks the chinese exam so sian... had to take the exam with sec 2s 3s n other ppl from other schools in the hall.. the fan ahhhh... so strong blow my hair until so messy... lol blew kelly's paper away.. landed beside me.. i was like ohmygawd shud i pick? would the teacher say i cheating? then nvm lerh cus elaine helped her pick... paper one wrote until hand pain sia..... the compo horh i see liao dunno how to choose.. sat there fa dai 10 mins...but finished with half n hr leftover... paper 2.. gao lao shi say alot of ppl sure nvr do finished de.. so i choing ahhhhh... lol i always checking the time... then the last 15 mins they anoounced i was like ohmygawd!!! 3 more questions!! choinged like hell.. but still got 5 mins to check when i finished... paper quite cheem also actually.... ----------------------------- think must pull up my marks on history n science.. eeeeeeeeyerrr HISTORY faint sia.. see the textbook cover oledi wan to slp.. how to study it? muz tolerate it..!! cannot fail history cannot fail history cannot fail history cannot fail history!! aiyaaaaaaaaaaaah science.. lots of memorisation AGAIN..... suan lerh.... better start mugging hard tonight..... hate exams sia... so much stress derh.... gonna destress for a bit then go study harddddd... xoxo , you know you love me . Sunday, April 27, 2008
stressed ;D at 7:22 PMwow tml first paper of MYE (what the hell m i doing here then?) lol nvm take a break larhs whole day study enuf liao... post left, post right, also dunno what to post tml english paper tml tml higher mt tml tml tml maths ( die ) tml tml tml tml labour day... gt english tuition frm 5-6.30 ( mus rmb!! ) tml tml tml tml tml history ( must mug well ) next week first day... general science ( study lil bit more ) aiya all die lahh muz stay late n mugg lerh dun chat liao xoxo , you know you love me . thankiew at 12:49 AMim feeling much better lerh.. wow so touched tt so mani ppl cares bout me. they're right it isn't the end of the world.. n peelyn is so much worse, n shes alive.. so i cant die before she does... lol love my kor n ppl who cares bout me... --------------- even if he ignores me.. i dont mind.... even if he doesn't care.... i shouldn't either.. besides it wouldn't affect me.. cause around me there are many ppl much better than you... without you.... its still gonna be okay.. =] n i know, everyting will work out in time everything will straighten out themselves i'll just have to work harder.... ---------------- xoxo , you know you love me . Wednesday, April 23, 2008
i dont know what to do anymore at 6:07 PMsomebody kill me... somebody just free me from all of these... nothing seem to work out these days... emo. gastric. broke someone's heart.. got ignored.. heard that he only likes me 70%.. seeing somebody i didnt want to see.. no appetite.. y cant i just die... forget it.... life's a chore.. n full of pain.. its like i've lost all directions in life.. i dun know where to go.. what to do... what to say.... i just want to close my eyes... and ignore everyting else around me.. even if i disappear.. nobody wud care... dun feel like talking to anyone or seeing anyone right now... xoxo , you know you love me . Sunday, April 20, 2008
woot ;D stressed at 7:37 PMgoing out with my korkor next tuesday at jurong mrt station....omygaaaaawd... i've like studied THE WHOLE day.. y cant mom go abit lax on me.. hm? worned- out n exhausted... brain spoiled =] fainting from all the MYE stress coming.. i must'nt fail anything!!!!!! iMUSTnotFAIL iMUSTnotFAIL!! MYE targets english- a2 ( highly possible, my strongest subject larhs ) maths- b3 ( i'll try my best ) chinese- b3 ( mayb? ) history- a2 ( impossible, but i'll try ) science- a2 ( work harder..!! ) home economics- b3 ( possible ) ------------- xoxo , you know you love me . Saturday, April 19, 2008
:[ at 4:00 PMdunno whye... i just dun understand... whye.. whye im feeling so sad... i shudnt be.. i've a family i've got frens but i just feel emo.. i feel isolated tired n exhausted i dun wan to do anything else. i just want to hug you love u with my heart n close my eyes as i lean against u.. ignore everything else around me but u.. my life iis full of anguish n agony.. no freedom no love just everything in a mess.. xoxo , you know you love me . haiz at 12:13 PMtot i can change my specs n bag today.. soo happy u know? then suddenly MOTHER POPPED OUT. 'CANNOT GO LARH! STAY AT HOME STUDY! MYE COMING STILL GO OUT GO OUT!!' i was like walauu... super hate her i tell u.. since 2 yrs ago my study she got care mar? play maple so much, only know how to come n yell at me go study niaaas... study study study will die wan leh! mye fail fail lorh, tink i care? super irritated liao.. tot i cud go out for once to walk about, to shop for a while.. WALAU 3 hrs go out oso cannot marh!?! n i really super hate that tze min.. folio oso so sloppy i tink she anyhow do de... my HE project is in a mess.. my EE project is in a MESS.. my homework is in a MESS..my studies are also in a MESS... my LIFE is totally in a MESS... somebody help me... ------ wj can reply my sms-es? please? xoxo , you know you love me . Thursday, April 17, 2008
kkays? at 5:32 PMim so fed up yesterday tt i forgot to post. im like already TOTALLY OVER WITH KW SINCE A WHOLE WEEK AGO. n he said we were not lo.. like what the hell?!? n i bet he was the one who gave his classmates my number.. they called my handfone n called me vulgarities.. tts one thing i cant stand lah... n dunno whye kw so bu shuang also. he was the one who said he didnt like me de or rather said that he couldnt love me de.. cannot love cannot la, if dun like me i got reason to stick around ma? BO RIGHT?! somemore give me that kind of wth-look... idiot.. plus sms me say wad WE ARE TOTALLY OVER?! HELLO?? i told u tt last WEEK.. got nothing to say lerh la p.s n peelyn was making a bitch out of herself xoxo , you know you love me . Tuesday, April 15, 2008
purlease? at 6:18 PMoh yawn... hm ytd JD called wj FISHBALL head.. hahaaa -----------> today morning.. mrs terrence blablablabla... haiz tink no more folding of skirts for me ( mayb a bit la ) JD GOT A HUGE LOLLIPOP FRM XIUSEN!!!! XIUSEN i ALSO WAN!!! envy sia but its her bdae! happi belated bdae JD! ( wahseh $29.90 sia ) -------------> recess nth happened -------------> lunch n after sku haha stayed back to wait for wj saw erm james? wj's fren in the lib doing hmwrk, i was feeling very hyper so UNDER the influence n encouragement of 1-1 peeps I WENT TO KAJIAO HIM! hahaa borrow this borrow that.. =P gt once i borrowed scissors n then returned le THEN borrow glue again.. he fainted o.o hahaa so funny! ( humph somemore call me go suck his balls, i threw his glue at him - still go complain to WJ ) STUPID~ ---------> bac at nan hua went home with wj then went jec little while buy things.. my HAIR GOT PULLED BY PEARLYN! what the hell did she tink she was doing? cant she tap me shoulder or sth?! idiot peelyn ( after that she apologised said 137 sorrys , but sry gt cure meh?! ) went bac to nan hua . walao nan hua empty liao siao oni got a few ppl n teachers.. i suddenly rmb the p5s got p5 camp haiz but still had fun... kkaes that all for now xoxo , you know you love me . Monday, April 14, 2008
ADDiCTӘD at 9:55 PMlurve this song --------------------------------------- Since u went away it's been one year two months But it just dun seem like yesterday we were still together Time has passed and things have changed so Why do I feel this way Cos you're with somebody else And I'm with somebody else but Whenever I think about the the love we had It hurts so bad Whenever I think about the love we made I said that I'd be strong Girl I really thought that I'd move on But still I find myself asking ( chorus- start ) Do u still think of me like I think about u Do u still dream of me cos I can't sleep without u Tell me if time should make a change Then why do I feel the same Your love has got me addicted Said I don't know When I'm with a chick and hittin it girl I call your name Said I don't know When I be with somebody else I push them away Tell me if time should make a change Then why do I feel the same I know I gotta move on but I'm so addicted to u ( chorus- end ) It's been long enough don't know why I'm still holding on If I had a wish babe I would turn back the hands of time Cos u don't know what u got untill it's gone It's the reason why I'm writing u this song Girl I'm slippin and I don't know what to do Girl I admit it, I'm sick over u Damn I realised my mistake, my pride got in the way I should have begged u to stay ( chorus ) If u ever lost someone u truely love Let me hear u say yeah And if u lost someone u truely need Let me hear u say yeah ( chorus ) xoxo , you know you love me . okayys at 7:00 PMii shall take my sides now... IIE HATE PEARLYN ! ! ! thought she wudd change u noe? but oh well... she didnt.. made a mistake to befriend her.. lets have examples: she sent me an sms - this is a poem ( bla bla bla bout true frens bla bla ) sent this to all your true friends!! i replied: im ur true friend? pearlyn: ermmm... not really... ( what the hell?!! ) iie : yy ne? pearlyn: errr.. i dun really trust friends right now... ( i was thinking whye then she sent me that true fren msg ) iie: including me? pearlyn: sorry... i dun trust anyone but myself now.. ( walao? ) iie: y did u sent me that msg then? pearlyn : i had nth to do waddd... ( ohmygawd, cheated ) iie: dun tok to me pearlyn: whehhhh... dun angry laaa... its bcus of saung lorrrhh ( now complaining bout saung ) she not friends with me lerh... one of the LAME reasons is that i cant catch a freakking basket ball... the ball angle wrong oso not myy fault.... ( So? cant she adjust herself ? ) - saung u see tt? iie: wadeva.... ------------ dun wan to tok bout her liao... xoxo , you know you love me . Sunday, April 13, 2008
sob at 8:47 PMwhere are you.... please reply me..... where did u go? dun ignore me please..... please dun tuck me away... PLEASE! ! i beg you.. please xoxo , you know you love me . Saturday, April 12, 2008
=] at 2:12 PMher heart is torn apart As she lies in her room alone tears are rolling down her cheeks And her screams are drowned by the phone dial But theres no one on the other end and she knows she's all alone she's weeping inside out but no one seems to care She reaches out for a hand to hold But she just grasps the cold night air Now hope sounds like a foreign word And sadness is her best friend Her dreams and hopes are dashed And are replaced by nightmares unplanned smiles are never found on her face just sadness everywhere ------------------------ edited by cheryl original on mariyah's blog ( found this really nice) xoxo , you know you love me . Friday, April 11, 2008
Games Day at 10:35 PMhaiz.. raining n raining n raining... super bad luck lorh ; cross country raining n games day also raining! sian... sat down there n day-dreamed. world record made on 11/ 4/ 08: bored to death in the multi purpose hall. lolz. sec 1 totally NO games at all la.. sit down there n watch other ppl play, dun sian cai guai.. got lollipop frm wj =D =D =D n h2o o_o set of to jec at 12. 30 pm with wj.. reached there at 1 plus ( wow 1/2 hr bus ride ) classmates all saw me lorhh.. monday dunno how i die =X bu de hao si went home bout 2 xoxo , you know you love me . Wednesday, April 09, 2008
hahaz at 5:47 PMtoday pretty happy... except this morning.. was angry cus tze ming bought a cheapskate cube 4 me la! but at least got a cube -------------------> forward to after sku met up with wj... my classmates saw us tgt n started teasing =\ went to jec to buy sth went bac to sku.. saw my classmates again n kena teased AGAIN (sian) they like all *cat calling* larh. especially ROHINI (rohini im so gonna kill you for telling the class) ------------------- p.s: i not stead with k.w ler.. please dun mistake us for being together... thankiew n so stop calling me, k.w's gf xoxo , you know you love me . Monday, April 07, 2008
another sad one at 6:22 PM--------------------------------- time drags along so slowly... she stares at him blankly.. but he didnt know.. that she has been waiting for him all along.. each time she hears the sentence ' i nvr loved you ' can you imagine.. how it tears her heart apart.. ripping it into shreds ... whye? she wonders whye must it happen to me n not others? shes yearning for love n passion as she cries out loud in her dark n lonely room but no one hears hear... even if they did.. she was ignored, being tucked away in their minds but what else can she do? she just sits n waits sits n waits for the one.. the only person meant for her... ----------------------------- xoxo , you know you love me . today sian at 6:08 PMlol.. today sianz..... --------------> forward to after sku had chinese oral today! i wasnt scared or nervous until i was going next... omygawd was so scared until was kind of stuttering larh... think i failed anyway... worry oso no use.. I MUST JIAYOUS barh!! -----> after oral went to SAC with wj while waiting 4 chenchen...read finish my book there ( almost won him )...then went home with him since chenchen not around. also went to buy another cola lollipop with Lin.. went on the same train too ------------> forward to in the train snatched a seat ( beside two uncles o . o) chatted bout lots of stuff then finally reached clementi station -----------> forward to while walking home lol i so unlucky... turned one corner saw one rubbish truck so i *SIAM-ed* but ALAS! turn the other corner got ANOTHER rubbish truck.... haiz.. got home SAFELY =D xoxo , you know you love me . Saturday, April 05, 2008
HALLELUYA!! at 6:33 PMlol so happy for totally no reason... hahas.. today i totally dressed up n went out luhh.. (i ignored my parents, bleah!) it was kind of boring walking alone la... mayb next time i shud call my frens with me... stressed, mid-yr exams coming n my maths ah; still blurblur; dunno how to do! I love kitkat! (omg, ate 2 bars of kitkat today!) --------------------------- Lyrics for is it you by Cassie I'm looking for a lover not a friend Somebody who can be there when I need someone to talk to I'm looking for someone who won't pretend Somebody not afraid to say the way they feel about you And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel, Someone who can keep me real and who knows always Baby I like to have you in my way And I'm looking for someone who takes me there, Wants to share, shows he cares Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for (start of chorus) Is it you? is it you? Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for Could you be the one for me? Could you be the one I need? Is it you? is it you? Maybe you're the one I've been waiting for Could you be the one for me? (Could you be?) Could you be the one I need? (end of chorus) I'm looking for someone to share my pain (Uh) Someone who I can run to, who would stay with me when it rains Someone who I can cry with trough the night Someone who I can trust who's hardest right And I'm looking for someone And I'm looking for someone who understands how I feel, Someone who can keep me real and who knows always Baby I like to have you in my way And I'm looking for someone who takes me there, Want to share, shows he cares Thinking on the one that I've been waiting for (chorus) Take for grant How much I care (How much I care) And appreciates that I'm there Someone who listens And someone I can call who isn't afraid of thought to share (chorus) ---------------------------- nice song .. i like it xoxo , you know you love me . Friday, April 04, 2008
=] at 10:35 PMtoday's just a normal daae 4 mie... but today happier... hahs =] today dance so sian... 1. warm up.. (yay can do left-leg side spilt lerh but painful) 2. *ba gan* sth which i hate... 3. spilt jumps... 4. then do preparation for dance in june... (haha, mei jia today got lifted up doing split, SO PRO!!!).. but overall very very sian.. to seniors: sammy jie n celestiine(?) u two today very pretty in that costume n make up worh! lunch n recess very interesting todae oso ...hahas snatched the last plate of chicken chop frm chenchen... haiz now she angry coz of the little BITE frm me.. eh she pull my hand so hard larh.. tell me who wont bite 0.0 i totally lurve lollipops, kitkat n all aloe vera drinks (except peach)!!!! xoxo , you know you love me . Thursday, April 03, 2008
haiz emo at 6:55 PMhappiness only lasts 4 ONE day niaa... today so emo .______________. --------------------------- baby y did you give me false hope, false chance to love, n u just said that i just cant bring myself to love you.. im so sorry.. wud our relationship continue? after all the false hopes, false happiness, i discover that u didnt like me after all you cant imagine the hurt, the pain n sorrow i felt deep inside my heart.. i nvr felt this way before but lemme say i nvr loved you that deep so mayb i can forget you soon, soon.. but i can nvr forget the hurt n the pain u made me feel... i just discovered you didnt even cared for me at all you just ignored me its just like throwing a pail of snow over me but dun worry no matter what u will still b my fren --------------------- just a poem done frm my heart xoxo , you know you love me . Wednesday, April 02, 2008
=D at 5:12 PM好开心哦! today kind of happy lerh =] shhh... reason i dun tell u..! bought lollipops too ( one strawberry 4 clara, one cola 4 me )!! lollipops especially chupachupps is da best! sweet n comforting =) xoxo , you know you love me . Tuesday, April 01, 2008
ooo at 9:23 PMtoday was kind of usual larh... no funny stuff , in fact nothing worth mentioning to day lor...except during dance we have to pull the legs up or sth , i tell you my hands felt like it was going to be wrenched off liddat super painful n thru-out the whole dance lesson i was feeling light headed n had a headache...n the seniors were asking me bout kw n i again lorh... xoxo , you know you love me . |
The Girl Next Door . Cheryl ♥  Slideshow :D |
